8 Years

 On this day, 8 years ago, my dad passed away.

It was the day before my dad’s 56th birthday.

And only 9 days before my parents' 31st anniversary.

8 years ago, my heart was broken worse than ever before. And you know... Some days, it feels just like yesterday while other days it feels like it's been an eternity. 

This year, it's been much harder. And I can't figure out why. I just find myself grieving stronger than in years past. And that's hard. So hard.

I wish, more than anything, that I could call my dad and ask him for advice about various situations, to ask for help with finding a Bible passage to help me with whatever issue I'm facing, or even more than that, that I could call and ask him to pray for me. Because I knew I could always count on him to do all of those things. He'd drop whatever he was doing to help me with that. And I miss that.

And while I had a few months shy of 30 years with my dad, I'm secretly (or not so secretly annoyed that that was all I got. And sometimes, I truly wonder why... I wonder why he had to pass away so young. I wonder why our family had to deal with this huge loss. I wonder why, if I ever get married or have children, he'll never get to meet them. I wonder why my mom has to be a widow. I wonder why my nieces will only have just a few memories of my dad - a man who absolutely, positively loved being a Pawpaw to those girls - who's life goal was to be a grandparent ;)

And then, I think about what I did/do have. I'm thankful for a Christian heritage he continued with our family. I'm thankful for the love of learning he passed down. 

I'm thankful for 29.5 years worth of happy memories.

I'm thankful, that even though, I'll never get to experience having him at my own possible wedding or births of possible future children, I got to see the immense joy/pride/love he showed on the day of my brother and sister-in-law's wedding and of all the time he joyfully spent with my beautiful nieces.

I'm thankful for so much.

And yes, I do still miss him terribly. 

But, I can smile, thinking of him hanging out with Jesus and talking to all the people from the Bible whom he loved to read/study/preach about for all those years. What a fun time that must be!Because you see... My dad loved the Lord with all his heart. And he loved sharing about the Lord with anyone who would listen. In fact, my dad preached his last sermon from his hospital bed exactly one week before he passed away. Using Romans 8:18 as his primary verse, he reminded us that, though we may experience suffering and pain here on earth, we can trust in the hope of our Savior. We can trust in the knowledge that if we are saved, we will experience that glory that is beyond compare.  And now, today, I am so incredibly thankful that his words are permanently etched into my memory. 

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I've written memories-filled posts every year on the anniversary of his death, which can be found below. While still sad, it's nice for me to be able to look back and remember how God's been with me through the past years' anniversaries...

1 year

2 years

3 years

4 years

5 years

6 years

7 years

Currently

   Happy Monday, Y'all

Today I'm joining Anne from In Residence for her monthly link-up, where we share what's currently going on in our lives. And each month, Anne gives us a list of prompts to use to guide our posts. 

April's prompts are...

  * getting * going * planning * posting * thinking *

I'm currently getting back to school, after two weeks off for Spring Break. I can't say my break was entirely work-free. But still... I did get to sleep later than 5:30 each day, so that part was nice :)

I'm currently going, or should I say, I went, no where for Spring Break. I was supposed to go to Prague for a conference, which would have been quite awesome. But, between COVID and the stuff happening in the Ukraine, the conference got cancelled. I was definitely bummed about this cancellation at first. But I must admit... It was nice being home, having some quiet time, and resting, all of which will be especially nice, since April is going to be busier than normal for me. 

I'm currently planning lessons on the truth of Easter this week. Have I mentioned lately how much I love working at a Christian school? :)

I'm currently posting nothing terribly exciting... I did post the meme below on Facebook yesterday, as I was in the middle of pricing tickets for my flight to the US this summer. My oh my is flying expensive...

I'm currently thinking about two families who are hurting and mourning the loss of their loved ones. A pastor from a church in Alabama passed away. And then, a fellow AG missionary recently passed away, as well. I love the thought of both of these men hanging out with Jesus, swapping stories, and being welcomed by the people they helped lead to salvation. But even with that... My heart still breaks for two families mourning the loss of such great men, who so obviously loved their families and the people they ministered to. Will you help me pray for both of their families?

And that's about it for me at the moment.

So what about you?

What are you currently up to?

5 years

5 years

My dad passed away 5 years ago.

5 years ago (Sunday), my heart was hurting worse than ever before.

It was the day before my dad's 56th birthday.

It was only 9 days before my parents' 31 anniversary...

And I'm not going to lie... It was hard. And I cried. ...a lot.

While he did continue working (pastoring his church and also teaching at a local middle school) until almost the end, my dad was so sick. He had suffered off and on for almost a decade. He was on dialysis, thanks to the effects of kidney cancer. And his heart slowly gave out on him, thanks to multiple heart attacks and other random heart related issues. So for right at a full decade, my dad was sick. So while it was hard to let him go, I also knew, deep in my heart, that I didn't want him to suffer anymore.

And as a result, when the end came, he reminded us of something he'd preached my entire life. As Christians, we are not exempt from struggles and suffering. Far from it, actually... But we know that if a person is saved, they have nothing to fear when it comes to death. They know they're going to a better place. The glory of Heaven and eternal life with our Heavenly Father is beyond compare.



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I've written memories-filled posts every year on the anniversary of his death, which can be found below. While still sad, it's nice for me to be able to look back and remember how God's been with me through the past 5 years...

1 year

2 years

3 years

4 years

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 Today, I'm joining Erika and Andrea, for their weekly Friday Favorites linkup and sharing about one of my most favorite people - my dad. And while the reason for this post is by no means a favorite, I still am so very grateful for all of the memories I have.