Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Thoughts on Grief

*Disclaimer - Before reading this post, you should know that it's truly a hodgepodge of thoughts and is a bit random and kind of jumps around a bit...



It's been 1 year and 6 months since my dad passed away.

Actually, it's been 543 days, but who's counting?

And sometimes it feels as if it were only yesterday.


Not long after my dad died, someone told me that grief is like an ocean.

And I've found that statement to be true. It really does come and go like waves. You never really know when it's going to hit you.  Sometimes the wave of grief is so strong that it feels almost like a punch in the gut and it totally takes my breath away.

A truly well meaning person told me the other day that you have to eventually throw out the grief. You can't dwell on it forever. She wasn't even talking about my grief. She was talking about someone else she knows that lost a loved one a few years ago. 

And while I didn't actually respond to her RIDICULOUS comment, I so wanted to... I wanted to say, "Are you kidding me?! Have you ever lost someone close to you? Clearly not..."

Unfortunately, grief is something that will always be there deep down inside you. And just like those ocean waves, you never know when it's going to rear its ugly head.



While looking for a quote for this post, I found the one below. I thought it was a great explanation of the reality of grief. ...far better than I could have explained it myself.



Grief is hard. But we need to go easy on ourselves. 

It doesn't matter if it's been a month.

...or a year and a half like me.

...or if it's been 10 years. Or 20. Or 100. 

The point is simple.

We need to give ourselves (and others) permission to grieve.


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